Tomorrow will be a special day. Well i hope so. I will be a year older and time for me to get depressed once more. I just don't know why I am like this every time my birthday comes.
No plans at all. I just don't know how my birthday will go. Maybe it would be just like any ordinary day. No special in short. Perhaps I will just celebrate it alone and reflect to what had happened to me for the past 25 years and prepare myself for another year for me to get depressed, again
Jailed. That's how I feel. Prisoned to the things I am doing. Lock in the place I don't want to, and be with people that don't understands me. Maybe they do. Maybe they pretend that they understands me. Really. Maybe they pretend that they know me. Maybe I just believe in them. Pretend that I believe in them. The hell I care though. Life must go on....
I feel that I want to end this. I'm up to it. Enough???! Suicide? Hell No, the sweetest way to commit suicide is to endure all the pains while living. For me that's best. And It works a bit. A piece of me is dying gradually....
I'm dead. Part of me to be exact. A piece of me is not me anymore. I killed myself, part of myself. I killed myself for me to be reborn. Killed myself so a new me will be appreciated by people, and even not. Enough to those times of trying my best to show my best. Enough to it. Ill just be the REAL me. The RIGHTEOUS me. Who cares if you don't like the real me though. Do i like you? hahahahaha. Perhaps Ill just do whatever I think is right. Enough of thinking other people. Ill just think of myself, for a happy me. Selfish it may sound but I swear its not. You wont agree? then maybe you too is selfish.....
Enough of Enough...
Life must go on....
It would only stop if the hell and heaven closes...
Enough of dramas,
Enough of this blog....
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